TESTIMONY 14: MY SECOND SIGN FROM THE HOLY SPIRIT

(Re-written from my journal)

20 November 2014: I just saw my second animal spirit symbol in my room. I decided that it is important for me to start keeping record of these things to help others become aware of what is happening in the spiritual realm and also to keep as a part of my collection of testimonies (to restore the faith of unbelievers). I don't think anyone would believe these things if they haven't witnessed my full journey/story, I feel that I would perhaps be labelled as insane to anyone who is not open to spiritual truth, especially those unfamiliar with the Holy Spirit - because that's what we tend to do. "If I don't understand it, if it didn't happen to me, then I'm going to label it as weird and insane." So the only people I have spoken to about this is my father, mother, brother and best-friends who have witnessed my entire journey since I was saved by Jesus. (If you would like to virtually witness my journey then simply read from Testimony 1 upward)

So I've already briefly shared a post on the previous animal spirit symbol I was shown (Testimony 13) it was the symbol of a crab, and was shown to me in a bright pale-yellow light. (If you didn't read that testimony I will add it into this with even more detail) What makes the first animal spirit symbol so mind-blowing is that 2/3 days before the night of seeing it (shaped like a crab) there was a dead crab laying right outside my sliding door. I was sitting at my bedroom desk when suddenly my domestic-worker-bestie walked into my room saying: "Sydney, there's a crab outside your sliding door hey. I saw it yesterday. It's dead. Did you see it?" "A crab? Don't lie Lien." I laughed, because: "there is no chance that a crab would be in our backyard." "Just open your blinds, it's still there." she said "I don't believe you." I said, while walking over to my sliding door lol but as I opened my blinds I had to believe, because there it was before my eyes - a random dead crab. If Lien had picked the crab up and disposed of it the day before, I would not have believed her, because I haven't seen a crab in years? And I always saw it near the ocean. What would one be doing in my area? What would one be doing in my backyard? I stood starring at the dead crab thinking how strange it was that "Not only is this crab in my backyard, but it crawled up to my gate when it could have crawled anywhere else? And the strangest fact of all, is that it crawled right here and died." Picture below of the dead crab laying on it's back:

After starring at it for a while I then closed my blinds and decided not to over-think this or try and link it to anything spiritual. "It's just a dead crab, there's no meaning." I told myself. Fast-forward 2/3 days later I'm sitting in my bed after a very long prayer on my knees. All of a sudden the atmosphere changed in my room. It became more "real", is the best word I can use to describe it, and I had the feeling that something supernatural was about to happen. It was like if an angel had to appear in front of me I would not be shocked or scared, kind of feeling. I looked around my room for a while waiting for something to happen, and it did. Up against my closet door appeared a yellow light in the clear shape of a crab. It didn't hit me immediately that there was still a dead crab placed outside my sliding door. It took me a few minutes to make that connection and it was quite the trip when I did lol my immediate thought was: "I need to find out what this means, I need to research it right now" and so that is what I did. I went onto the internet and searched on google: "Crab spirit Bible" to see what I could find that was biblical related and not "new age". I found an article on animal spirit symbols. Above the website read "EQUIPPING THE SAINTS FOR MINISTRY" It's subtitle was "THE HOLY SPIRIT IS NOT FOOLED". A part of the introduction read:

"Over years of ministering Isaiah 61, or the deliverance ministry, we have come to recognize individual spirits by pictures or visions that are repeatedly given by the Holy Spirit to pinpoint a certain entity. For instance, if the [Holy] Spirit shows us a mushroom cloud, as in the after wake of the atom bomb, we know we are dealing with a spirit of insanity" etc... and true or not I did not know but on this Website it listed all the types of evil spirit symbols and what they meant. There were so many! But I was in search for anything to do with a crab which is what I feel the Holy Spirit revealed to me, and I found it! On that massive list was (number 5): "Control spirit - Spider, Octopus, CRAB. It controls through it's arms leading to many hurts and wounds in a person. Just as the person seems to be almost free, it will pull one of it's tentacles to cause the person to pull back. The spirit conveys, and will slowly cause bitterness, hatred, unforgiveness and suicide to surface." 

And I started thinking about this one horrible day and night I had where I felt sad for no reason and I wondered why? I cried and started feeling sorry for myself. Thoughts like "I've been a victim all of my life is this ever going to end?" It was a random load of depression on me, who is normally happy 24/7 even when not smiling I'm happy inside, dancing everyday, singing everyday, but not that day. I immediately rebuked the spirit of control saying "You, spirit of control, I rebuke you right now in Jesus name, my body belongs to God. Satan has no power over my body in Jesus name!" and felt something lift off of me! I felt a gentle warmness in my stomach and an instant calmness. I am so glad God is showing me all of these things because now I know the reason we find so many unhappy, depressed, suicidal people in our world. They reach that point because they are being influenced and controlled by the unseen evil spirits. The world is unaware and has stopped believing in miracles and the supernatural/spiritual realm, so we all play the role of very easy victims.

So TODAY (20 September 2014) I was searching for videos on Jesus and the end times, because for some reason I had been doubting Jesus lately, even after what He did for me. I came across a very interesting end times video and after watching that Sid Roth Youtube Video (Paul McGuire Interview) at the end of the video he prayed for the viewer to have something supernatural happen to them, for the Holy Spirit to enter the room in which that person was, and for God to fill that person with what they needed to prepare them for the end times, I was that person lol I have to admit I became a slightly scared person when he looked into the camera and said that - because I thought "Oh boy what's gonna happen now..." lol but then he added that we are the ones who need to accept it though. So when the video ended I prayed "God you have not given me a spirit of fear, you have given me a spirit of power, love and of a sound mind. I accept anything you want to give me or show me. I am open to receive. In Jesus name. Amen." Again the room became "different" and I looked around the room and asked: "God could I see an angel?" (I had been asking for this a few days before that as well, but maybe I'm just not ready to see that yet, maybe it would scare me at this stage, or maybe it's not necessary). Suddenly, behind my door against my white wall, another light appeared. I thought it would be an angel, but it wasn't lol it was the very clear shape of a bird. I could see how the wings instead of going out though, were positioned going down on each side. The shoulders of the bird were quite squarely shaped as well. A little disappointed I thought "That's not an angel God" lol but I got back onto my laptop and searched for bird symbols. I wondered if there wasn't maybe something on that previous article on birds as I just focused on the crab spirit and lust spirit the last time (Testimony 13) and I found that there were two bird spirit symbols on that list. The one was a black bird, which didn't look like the one I saw, the other was a "Thunderbird" and I had no idea what a thunderbird looked like, so I googled it lol (Thank God for Google) and I found the EXACT shape the light was! Incredible! View the shape below (Of course it had no patterns, it was just a light yellowish white light in the following shape):

And on the same website it read: "Antichrist related spirit - thunderbird, morning bird of American Indian lore, swine or pig."  I thought all my doubts about Jesus must be coming from this spirit. I rebuked it immediately :) so yes, there is far more to the physical - that much I am certain of. And if you would like to walk this spiritual journey then say this prayer: "Father God, I love you. I am a sinner, but I do not want to sin anymore. I believe that you sent your son Jesus into the world as a human sacrifice for our sins. I believe that Jesus was crucified, and that You rose him from the dead again. I believe that he is seated at the right hand side of you in Heaven. I believe He will come again. Let your will be done on earth as it is in Heaven God. Satan no longer has power over me. In Jesus name. Amen."

"Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved,

but whoever does not believe will be condemned."

(Mark 16:16)

God bless you, guide you and protect you... Amen. 

TESTIMONY 10: ATTACKED AFTER TRYING TO SPEAK IN TONGUES

So in the last post I shared a story about a new church I tried where everyone was speaking in tongues, and how I tried, but I failed. Well, I tried again lol on the way to my casting! It was just me and my earthly father in the car and he had left me alone for a short while when picking up something at the vet for our dogs. During this short while I remembered Kelly telling me that I should practice speaking in tongues. I had decided to attempt it right there at that moment while I had some alone time. I thought, well if this really is a secret way of talking to God, a language the devil cannot interpret, then I want to be apart of this. After all it is mentioned in the Bible?

"In my name they will drive out demons; they will speak in new tongues; they will pick up snakes with their hands; and when they drink deadly poison, it will not hurt them at all; they will place their hands on sick people, and they will get well."

(Mark 16: 17-18)

So I closed my eyes, raised my hand in the air and started. So I tried speaking in tongues just saying whatever flowed out of my mouth and I started feeling different, it's so hard to explain, but I felt something inside me happen and a presence. The same light-headed feeling I got at the church was back, and for a split second I was on my way to a smile and maybe even a giggle, just because it was such a different feeling, but then I started feeling light-headed in a bad way. At this moment my father got back into the car and I kept silent, but I was panicking inside. I thought "Oh no, did I just do something I thought was right but is actually wrong in God's eyes?"

There was a bit of a battle taking place in my mind. "What if speaking in tongues is actually evil and I was deceived? Oh dear God, please forgive me if what I did was evil." "No wait I could just be getting attacked because I'm now seen as a threat being able to speak in tongues?" this went on the whole trip towards town. I felt like I was being attacked, spiritually. I mean, how do you fight against something you can't see? Answer? You pray! Prayer is said in the material/physical world, but it works in the spiritual realm. At this point my heart was pounding, My chest was tight, my mind was consumed with paranoid thoughts, I felt like I was going to die on the spot. I pulled my seat back to lay down. I started searching for a prayer against evil on my phone and came across a brilliantly long one. While I was trying to read it and feel it, my dad starts asking me questions lol and in my mind I'm just like, dad this is just really not the time lol but I was responding bluntly, all in all I was trying to remain as calm as possible so that he didn't worry. "Penny for your thoughts?" he asked again. I completely ignored that question. "Are you okay?" "Are you tired?" "Yes, I'm just tired." (easiest way to hide any emotional struggle - say you're tired) matter resolved. I didn't get to finish the prayer in the car, but I started feeling better when I said that I am protected by the blood of Jesus Christ and that no weapon formed against me will prosper, but when I arrived inside the building of my casting I felt it again. I thought "Great, model dies at casting..."

When I reached the floor of Glamour Magazine I kept calm tried to smile while saying hi to Michelle and Kelly (Testimony 9) who were also casting and went straight to the bathroom to pray. I finished that whole prayer and felt a million times better after, like something had just been lifted off of me. I also messaged someone I really trust to pray for me and just like that, it was gone, I was back to my happy self, but one thing was on my mind. "I am done modelling, this is it, I can't live a double life, wanting to live my entire life for God and then I have to go to these castings and shoots in between. I just want a clean life." Now, I had been wanting to quit for a long time, and finally did it with my previous agency. Then I was approached by another and I took it as a sign that there was a reason I had to continue. I thought more people would listen to me if I were a model, and maybe I'm right, but at that point I said this is enough, I'm done forever now. The few minutes it lasted felt liberating lol I was feeling so confident about my choice that I told the client with a smile on my face "This is my last casting," she asked me "Oh really, why?" I thought for a second and responded "I guess you could say, because of God." then I left like a boss lol after the casting was done of course.

When I got back into the car I told my father the same thing "this was my last casting, I'm done modelling." "What happened did they say something?" he asked. I explained what had happened to me in the car while he was gone and he gave me some really good advice. "You know what, I knew something was wrong I know my daughter. This is what I was worried about, you getting attacked by evil, because you wanna do such good things and you so extreme. But Sydney, regarding your career you are meant to be a model God wouldn't have made you beautiful if you weren't, there's a reason God made you the way you are, God gave you gifts and you must use your gifts." I interrupted him saying I don't enjoy it anymore like I used to, and that it went against everything I believed in, beauty is not a face it's a soul. When you look at it in the larger picture, the modelling industry is spreading to the whole world that your image is everything. We models advertise make-up, hair products, skin products, fashion, jewellery, and we create this image that every other girl in the world thinks they can be - when really the models don't even look like the images in the magazine.

In the Bible it says we should not make ourselves beautiful with outer aids, God favours a beautiful soul: "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewellery or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauy of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." - (1 Peter 3:3-4)

"I want to sing gospel music and be a writer" "Okay well there, then be a singer and a writer you have many gifts, but I don't want to tell you the wrong thing, I suggest that you rather ask God what the best choice career would be for you. Then you make your decision." My dad had then reminded me about the most important thing, what about letting God's will be done? I need to flow with God's plan for me, not my own plan. I might be thinking that quitting modelling is what He wants, but what if it;s apart of His plan? I agreed to ask God.The whole way back home I was just thanking God for getting me out of that dark place, saving me, protecting me, caring about me. My eyes were tearing slightly as I was overwhelmed with thanksgiving! What a wonderful, powerful almighty God!!!!

When I got home I held the Bible in my hands and said "Father God, I know this book has all the answers. Show me a sign that I should either stop modelling or continue. I don't want to model anymore, I don't enjoy it. But if you want me to continue for some reason, I will do it for you. Let your will be done." The Bible separated at two places. I put my hand between the first section it separated and opened the other first, just to be safe. It was about something that didn't relate to career, so I paged back to the first section and read (Psalms 105)

 

"tell the nations what he has done.

Sing praise to the Lord,

Tell of the wonderful things he has done." 

I took this as a sign that I should be singing about God and writing about God, I opened at another random section and it read "Leave your family and country and go where I will show you." let's see where this journey is heading :) I'd just like to once again, thank God for what He did for me today. God is my life and words can't do enough here.... I am so glad that THE ALMIGHTY GOD, who has authority over everything loves and protects me! He really loves us a lot!

Glory be to God